I’m torn between being strong and breaking down.
I think we all have a license to breakdown once in a while. And for a very long while now, I’ve been bombarded with flashbacks of memories that I’ve been trying so hard to suppress from my thoughts. I’m hiding it from everybody else because they seem petty and embarrassing compared to what everybody else is going through. It just hurts to have to go through them again in my mind.
It’s too much. I don’t want to go through this anymore. At least when I’m consumed with things that I have to do, I forget. But every waking moment that I’m idle or I’m not thinking of work, the flashbacks creep up and it’s making me want to cry.